i'm lost.
in the absence of your touch
i played with the wind.
cool, teasing wind.
in the cover of wide fluorescent lights
i sighed and closed my eyes
the wind teased, and i imagined it was you.
i follow the wind.
it does not compel me the way your words do.
it does not evoke in me longing, the way your name does.
but i follow it, for you are not there to hold me, to keep me.
in the wind, i felt free. courageous even.
but in my heart of hearts, i hoped.
careful, breezy wind.
oh wind, wrap your arms around me and hold me close.
but in my soul of souls, i hoped.
whisper to me and i will fight the wind.
whisper to me and i will abandon the sweet, kind wind.
whisper to me.
whisper, before i am lost to the wind.
Wednesday, December 30, 2009
Tuesday, August 18, 2009
the list
Due to the list-police aka N. Semblante here’s the long awaited list.
Here’s a little background. On the night before my 24th birthday I was kidnapped and forced to eat numerous slices of pizza, plateful of pasta, a cup of coffee thrown it and topped with an oatmeal-raisin cookie. After that horrific incident, I was thrown in a jeepney and driven to a not so secluded area for more torture in the form of a glass of beer. And it was there that it happened. At the stroke of midnight, the culprits pulled out a hypothetical gun and held it to my head. The terrible two forced me to list down 24 things that I must do before my 25th birthday.
The stipulations were as follows:
- I have to complete at least 2/3 of the list
- Complete tasks in no particular order
- Document completed tasks if possible
- In the event that I am unable to follow through, I have to shell out some cash and feed my kidnappers.
Finally, I present the list.
- Learn to cook (at least 1 recipe)
- Clean the dirty mistresses’ room
- Bungee jump ( as if!)
- Get a new hobby
- Participate in a sport
- Change my wardrobe
- Exercise regularly
- Learn to drive (again!)
- Learn first aide
- Change my hairstyle
- Get a promotion
- Go clubbing
- Go on a date
- Get a facial
- Do the deed
- Skinny dip
- Dine at the Marco Polo buffet
- Attend a concert
- Befriend someone I don’t like
- Tell someone I like him / her
- Tell someone I don’t like him / her
- Buy a gadget
- Watch in it’s entirety one HCP movie
- Do volunteer work
Tune back next year to see what I was able to check off on this “24 things to do before I turn 25” countdown.
Here’s a little background. On the night before my 24th birthday I was kidnapped and forced to eat numerous slices of pizza, plateful of pasta, a cup of coffee thrown it and topped with an oatmeal-raisin cookie. After that horrific incident, I was thrown in a jeepney and driven to a not so secluded area for more torture in the form of a glass of beer. And it was there that it happened. At the stroke of midnight, the culprits pulled out a hypothetical gun and held it to my head. The terrible two forced me to list down 24 things that I must do before my 25th birthday.
The stipulations were as follows:
- I have to complete at least 2/3 of the list
- Complete tasks in no particular order
- Document completed tasks if possible
- In the event that I am unable to follow through, I have to shell out some cash and feed my kidnappers.
Finally, I present the list.
- Learn to cook (at least 1 recipe)
- Clean the dirty mistresses’ room
- Bungee jump ( as if!)
- Get a new hobby
- Participate in a sport
- Change my wardrobe
- Exercise regularly
- Learn to drive (again!)
- Learn first aide
- Change my hairstyle
- Get a promotion
- Go clubbing
- Go on a date
- Get a facial
- Do the deed
- Skinny dip
- Dine at the Marco Polo buffet
- Attend a concert
- Befriend someone I don’t like
- Tell someone I like him / her
- Tell someone I don’t like him / her
- Buy a gadget
- Watch in it’s entirety one HCP movie
- Do volunteer work
Tune back next year to see what I was able to check off on this “24 things to do before I turn 25” countdown.
Sunday, July 26, 2009
episode 3. she's back
he knew he was early, but so what? he hasn't seen her in 3 months. he knew that her job took her to different places all the time but he didn't like how they said goodbye the last time.
his mobile phone rings.
Faith , his screen read.
"hey, what's up?", he says.
"where are you? can you go with me to the mall today? i have to pick up some stuff." she answers.
"babe. i told you yesterday i was gonna be busy. J's set to arrive today. i'm on my way to pick her up".
"oh right. i forgot. but do you have to be with her the WHOLE day? i'm just asking for an hour or two.." she insists.
"well we have a lot of catching up to do, ok? why don't you just ask one of your friends. i don't like shopping anyway"., he replies.
"i guess..so call me when you get home, ok? and tell Jordan i said welcome home."
he gets in the car.all thought focused on seeing Jordan again. he missed his friend. it wasn't just the fact that they were on different continents. when they talked on the phone or sent emails, he'd felt that there was something wrong...but he couldn't put his finger on it. and he was determined to ply her with alcohol to get her talking.
he finds a parking space and waits for her at the gate. her flight was delayed. but he didn't mind. all he could think about was "finally! J's back!".
he sees her and waves. she sees him, a big smile on her face. she runs to him.. give him a big hug. a kiss on the cheek. another hug.
"have you been a good boy?", she teases.
"you know it. you weren't here to get me in trouble",he answers back.
they smile. then she steps back. he frowned at that a little.
then she holds out her hand to the guy behind her, and says "Ryan, this is Jake. Jake, this is Ryan."
he's taken aback. she never mentioned this Jake person.
she then slings her arms around both men and says "Now all my boys are here. This is great!"
she didn't see her boys sizing each other up.
his mobile phone rings.
Faith , his screen read.
"hey, what's up?", he says.
"where are you? can you go with me to the mall today? i have to pick up some stuff." she answers.
"babe. i told you yesterday i was gonna be busy. J's set to arrive today. i'm on my way to pick her up".
"oh right. i forgot. but do you have to be with her the WHOLE day? i'm just asking for an hour or two.." she insists.
"well we have a lot of catching up to do, ok? why don't you just ask one of your friends. i don't like shopping anyway"., he replies.
"i guess..so call me when you get home, ok? and tell Jordan i said welcome home."
he gets in the car.all thought focused on seeing Jordan again. he missed his friend. it wasn't just the fact that they were on different continents. when they talked on the phone or sent emails, he'd felt that there was something wrong...but he couldn't put his finger on it. and he was determined to ply her with alcohol to get her talking.
he finds a parking space and waits for her at the gate. her flight was delayed. but he didn't mind. all he could think about was "finally! J's back!".
he sees her and waves. she sees him, a big smile on her face. she runs to him.. give him a big hug. a kiss on the cheek. another hug.
"have you been a good boy?", she teases.
"you know it. you weren't here to get me in trouble",he answers back.
they smile. then she steps back. he frowned at that a little.
then she holds out her hand to the guy behind her, and says "Ryan, this is Jake. Jake, this is Ryan."
he's taken aback. she never mentioned this Jake person.
she then slings her arms around both men and says "Now all my boys are here. This is great!"
she didn't see her boys sizing each other up.
my crazy four day weekend
crazy sched!!
had a lot of wedding preparations to do..dealt with suppliers, fam members in panic mode, guests from other countries and general wedding-related glitches..but i was glad to do them for my cuz...=)
then from bridesmaid i had to switch to 'tita mode' for my niece's 1st birdthay..all in the span of 12 hours. question, what do you get when you have birthday cake and add on about 2 dozen kids? the answer? BEDLAM! but i was happy to do it for my pamangkin.
then even after the birthday cake had settled in my tummy, had to put on my "supportive cousin gear". drank vodka, rode a bike, took a swim and ate a cheeseburger..did all that at plantation bay..not too shabby eh? i was glad to do that for..well..for me? hahaha
finally, i took a break and settled back at the apartment..
no complaints here..was glad to do all that..they'll do it for me too..that's what family is. we take care of each other.. even when we have to squeeze it all in on 1 weekend.
had a lot of wedding preparations to do..dealt with suppliers, fam members in panic mode, guests from other countries and general wedding-related glitches..but i was glad to do them for my cuz...=)
then from bridesmaid i had to switch to 'tita mode' for my niece's 1st birdthay..all in the span of 12 hours. question, what do you get when you have birthday cake and add on about 2 dozen kids? the answer? BEDLAM! but i was happy to do it for my pamangkin.
then even after the birthday cake had settled in my tummy, had to put on my "supportive cousin gear". drank vodka, rode a bike, took a swim and ate a cheeseburger..did all that at plantation bay..not too shabby eh? i was glad to do that for..well..for me? hahaha
finally, i took a break and settled back at the apartment..
no complaints here..was glad to do all that..they'll do it for me too..that's what family is. we take care of each other.. even when we have to squeeze it all in on 1 weekend.
Thursday, January 8, 2009
episode 2. phone calls
7:20 pm
her machine: hey, i can't or won't come to the phone right now. you know the drill.
him: hey! i'm just checking in. getting ready for THE date. i'll call you later..tell you how things are going.ok.bye.
she takes a deep breath as she listened to his message. here we go again, she thinks to herself.
11:45 pm
her machine: hey, i can't or won't come to the phone right now. you know the drill.
him: hey, where are you? we're on our way to club D&D. you were right. the movie was perfect for this date. i owe you. catch you later!
she turns up the volume of the television to block out the joy in his voice.
the next day
8 am
his machine: This is Ryan. Leave a message.
her: hey it's me. sorry i didn't catch you last night. glad you had fun. listen, i'm gonna be out of town for a week...work thing. dinner when i get back? you can tell me all the details then. i'll call you.
he was running out of the shower, trying to catch her before she hangs up the phone.
"Jordan! hey, don't hang..." *beep, beep* "..up.", he shakes his head.
"didn't even say where she was heading off to...", he mutters.
he goes into the kitchen, grabbed a cup of coffee.
meanwhile, as the plane takes off, she looks out the window and wishes that she could just continue to stay up in the clouds and dream of a better scenario.
her machine: hey, i can't or won't come to the phone right now. you know the drill.
him: hey! i'm just checking in. getting ready for THE date. i'll call you later..tell you how things are going.ok.bye.
she takes a deep breath as she listened to his message. here we go again, she thinks to herself.
11:45 pm
her machine: hey, i can't or won't come to the phone right now. you know the drill.
him: hey, where are you? we're on our way to club D&D. you were right. the movie was perfect for this date. i owe you. catch you later!
she turns up the volume of the television to block out the joy in his voice.
the next day
8 am
his machine: This is Ryan. Leave a message.
her: hey it's me. sorry i didn't catch you last night. glad you had fun. listen, i'm gonna be out of town for a week...work thing. dinner when i get back? you can tell me all the details then. i'll call you.
he was running out of the shower, trying to catch her before she hangs up the phone.
"Jordan! hey, don't hang..." *beep, beep* "..up.", he shakes his head.
"didn't even say where she was heading off to...", he mutters.
he goes into the kitchen, grabbed a cup of coffee.
meanwhile, as the plane takes off, she looks out the window and wishes that she could just continue to stay up in the clouds and dream of a better scenario.
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